Reproductive Rights?

So, the so-called "pregnant man" apparently gave birth to a baby girl. I don't know why this story pokes at my infertility like it does. I was particularly struck by the following paragraphs from an article in Slate Magazine

From Slate Magazine:
Beatie's transformation began a decade ago. "Sterilization is not a requirement for sex reassignment, so I decided to have chest reconstruction and testosterone therapy but kept my reproductive rights," he explained recently in the Advocate. "Reproductive rights" was a euphemism for his uterus and ovaries. "I actually opted not to do anything to my reproductive organs because I wanted to have a child one day," he told Oprah Winfrey in April.

For eight years, Beatie didn't menstruate. Then, two years ago, "I stopped taking my bimonthly testosterone injections," he recalls. "My body regulated itself after about four months, and I didn't have to take any exogenous estrogen, progesterone, or fertility drugs to aid my pregnancy." Meanwhile, his beard kept growing.

First of all, "he" had been taking testosterone for 8 years and it only took him 4 months for his cycles to return to normal after he stopped!!!! I'm working on 2 years off of bcp and I still don't feel like my cycles are back to "normal." And then he didn't even need any hormones or drugs to help him get pregnant or maintain his pregnancy? AND got pregnant with one try?

Secondly, what the hell are "reproductive rights." Do all women have the RIGHT to reproduce? What about those of us who can't? Does that mean nature or whatever, took our "rights" away for some reason?

I don't know, this story is obviously complicated, but I kinda think that if you don't want to be a woman any more and are trying to physically change your body so you have an enlarged clitoris that acts like a penis and your breasts are gone, that you have sort of decided to give up your "right" to have a child naturally. I mean, part of being a man means that you cannot bear children right?

What do you think? Does this bother anyone else?

Good Advice

I really enjoyed the Barren Advice column yesterday. I really understood where the advice seeker was coming from and the advice really hit close to home. W and I are still trying to figure out which of the three levels we belong to. Still not sure. We've given ourselves the summer to ponder and discuss some more. Then in October, when my next annual appt. is due. It will be decision time. I feel pretty good about that goal.

On the NCLM front, I officially majorly suck. I'm so far off the bandwagon that I'll never be able to catch up. I'm still exploring all the blogs on the list and I will continue to do so, but any sort of organized/orchestrated comment leaving cannot be done by this slacker blogger.

Shout Out!

I just gotta give a big shout out to all those of you for NCLM and from elsewhere that have been visiting and commenting on my blog! I love it!
And even though I'm now doing NCLM at my own pace (cause sometimes commitments are hard for me) I truly love the support and understanding everyone has brought.

Trying to get some painting done today, so no reflecting on family and kids and whatnot for now, but keep on bringin the love!

Thanks!

I'm Out

So, I didn't even make it two weeks in this crazy NaComLeaMo and I'm already behind and bowing out of the commitment. I just can't seem to leave 6 comments a day. I had a great strategy. I started at the top of the list and went methodically down 5 every day. That way I would be sure to comment on everybody's blogs and not leave anyone out. I was doing great for the first week, then I missed a day and tried to catch up and then forgot where I left off and then accidentily skipped over a couple and then and then and then....

I am really loving all the feedback and comments. I'm loving reading all these new blogs and getting to know all these new peeps, but I just can't keep up the pace with everything else I have going on in my life. I sooooo admire those doing this that can keep up with the commenting pace or even better be an Iron Commenter. I just don't have it in me.

So here is my new goal. I will leave one comment on every blog on this list. It just might take me awhile. I will try very hard to do it in a timely manner, but I can't make any promises.

Sorry, I hope I didn't disappoint too many people. Please keep commenting on my blog if you feel so inclined. I do so love connecting with you.

Why Kids?

Why do we want kids? Is it biological? Is it emotional? Is it societal?

As W and I are trying to figure out what our next steps are, I find myself asking this question a lot. Why do I want kids? I've posed this question to myself before, but I find that my answers are getting different. I'm older, I'm faced with the prospects of not being able to have them the way I thought I would, and it makes me wonder why it is I want them in the first place.

I think my main reasons are still that I do want to add to our family and I do want to contribute to the world by raising a good person to live on after I am gone, but I am no longer defining myself as much as a "mom" type. I am no longer linking it to my identity as a woman as much, and I am no longer thinking of kids as something that you are "supposed" to do in order to exist in society (ie. get married, have kids, have grandkids, etc., etc., etc.).

I guess I am learning that I am still a woman if I am not a mother and I am still a valuable member of society if I don't have kids. But, then, why do I still want one? I'm still working on the answer to that one.

Why do you want kids?

Lazy Weekend with My Little "Family"

It's going to be a LAZY weekend. The sun is still not shinning much here in the Northwest, so outdoor activities are not really much of an inviting option. So, our little "family" (me, W, and our two furry babies) are snuggling up on the couch and watching Battle Star Galactica on DVD. All in all, not a bad way to spend the weekend. Maybe the sun will come out tomorrow...

Who is part of your "family?"

Brain Block

I've had brain block on this blog for awhile. I've come to a place in this journey where I'm sort of just treading water until we figure out what we are going to do next, or, rather, what we are ready to do next. I've worked through a lot of my initial feelings about this struggle (through a lot of therapy) and have moved on to a more heady/less emotional place (although my emotions do get the better of me sometimes). We are also very busy in life and work these days, which has preoccupied my brain and daily activities.

So, I find I don't have quite as much to write about here as I did a year ago. This blog was supposed to be about our journey to create our modern family. I think I am going to have to expand that idea in order to fill the pages here week after week. Or, maybe this is a sign that it is time for W and I to really sit down, and DECIDE what our next steps should be. Where is this journey going? What should we do next? Maybe there is more to write about than I realize...